Approaching Easter

Living in L'Arche brings almost everything onto the surface again (all those I've put under the carpet), when all I want to do is hide and run away from myself.


As Easter approaches I am surprised by the unexpected experience (although not new but I much prefer smaller doses of them then an avalaunch of memories) I am experiencing and expected to do (like coming out in the open and talking about it).
As much as I'm negotiating (internally) with the 'Man Upstairs!', deep within I know what needs to be done. Yet, I have absolutely no courage or strength to face it or do it.
On one hand, I do know what must be done. Yet, on the other hand I am terrified even at the thought.


In the midst of all the internal struggles and negotiating, the daily routines still goes on. Work still needs to be done. Chores still needs attending to. Stomachs still needs to be fed. Weather getting colder as the days goes yet today, it was quite nice and sunny except when the wind blows it can get quite cold. The birds, bees & insects are starting to appear. I can hear the birds singing. Ants crawling in Bats-Ombak's bathroom. Daffodils blooming.

Yet, deep within (consciously or unconsciously) something is happening & only God knows what. Time has become my friend and in time, it will be revealed.


Whatever it may be, I ask for courage and strength to face my greatest enemy - myself.

Me & Food Again

I discovered this restaurant in South Croydon one day when I jumped on a bus (not knowing where it was taking me or going) and just went. Walking along the high streets of Croydon, I saw something intersting and popped my head on the window to discover 'Chicken Briyani' and it looked good.

So, in I went and ordered a plate. Oh.... it tastes so good, I've been going back (and taking friends there, too) ever since then on my rest days or whenever I crave for some really good Indian food.

They also serve Naan, Roti, Paratha with Chicken Curry of all sorts, Mutton Curry of all sorts and a variety of other stuff. The only thing I didn't enjoy there was their 'Lassi' (I found it too milky plus it wasn't sour enough as lassi's should be).
Apart from that, it's just ' heavenly'.

Along this road, you'll find 'Zaika Restaurant'

Day After Christmas (Boxing Day) 2006

The red oven (called 'Arga') is hot all day & night (never switches off). Most food are cooked in it or kept warm.
Top right = 1st hottest, Bottom right = 2nd hottest.
Top left = not so hot & Bottom left = to keep warm.

I've never experienced cooking pots as heavy as those we have in Gothic Lodge (name of our home). They weight a ton each (i think) and luckily I'd practiced taking weights in the gym before so that helped !

And whenever it gets too cold inside the house, I go there to keep myself warm, too.

I cook once or twice a week mostly (it's what I enjoy most... of all the other house chores! that needs to be done)

My 1st Snow Experience

Taken from my room window

Taken from L'Arche Lambeth office.

Never say Never !

It's been ages since I last wrote anything here.

I've been in the UK for more than 3.5 months now. Arriving on the 1st Dec. 2006 in L'Arche Community, Lambeth in South London.

Community life is very busy and hectic yet at the end of the day, it's very satisfying and I'm enjoying every moment of it.

There were many moments, I've had inner temper tantrum to throw everything away and just walk away from it all. Yet, deep within me... I know better than that.

The experience is invaluable although at times very painful coz I often meet myself time and again at places I'd love to run away from. Yet, deep within me... I know better than that.

What give me the strength (even though painful) to keep going?! At the end of the day... it's Bats-Ombak, Karo-Maro, Magi-Feri, Padi-Padi & Tari-Menari (not their real names). They are the ones who gives me the strengths and the joys.

What's the hardest/toughest/painful living here?

Comminity life.

What brings/gives me joy living here?

Community life.

I thought we were going to have an early Spring this year, 2 weeks ago but the weather have changed tremendously suddenly.

2 weeks ago, we had such sunny and bright weather. The Cherry Blossoms, Magnolias & Daffodils were blossoming so wonderfully until last Tuesday we had snow. I was at home at my Aunt's & Uncle's place when we had all 4 seasons in 1 day (snow, sun, rain and occassionally sleet! & frost, too !!!). I know when they say 'English weather'. Now, I know exactly what they mean. Since then, we've had occassional light snow and the wind eats into your bones.

Tonight, our clocks move forward 1 hour (which signifys the beginning of Spring officially-26 March every year) and it is exactly 1 year from today, I'd come to UK for my 6 months holiday last year.

I still remember saying these words (when Amar & Im had asked if I was going to visit L'Arche Community while in the UK) "No way! We'll see."

Now, look where I am. *smiling*

Never say never!